Staff Pick’ems: UA vs. Texas
Hell damn. Really hell damn. Here I thought that Arkansas was just playing down to its competition in those first two games. In reality, this is a complete re-building process and the more our underclassmen play, we probably won’t win many games this year. But let’s be honest, did any of us really think we were going to do extremely well anyway?
Last week the Flyers were torn as to who should win, which was pretty dumb if you watched the game or any highlights. Dern L. was the closest staffer, predicting a 30-7 score, but this week’s winner was the commenter Gerry. His prediction of 52-9 was pretty close and quite impressive. Gerry, you were right, too, things got ugly.
Now we face a pretty darn good Texas team. The Longhorns are ranked #7 in the country and have a 3-0 record with wins over Florida Atlantic, UTEP and Rice. The offense, led by darkhorse Heisman candidate Colt McCoy (who is their QB AND their leading rusher), is averaging over 48 points a game and the defense is allowing only 11. I hate to say it, but this week could be more of the same for the Hogs. The odd thing is that Texas Coach Mack Brown thinks we could give them a game. We Razorback fans can only hope.
Will the Hogs make Texas pay for postponing the game two weeks?
JTrain says: We go scoreless for the first half, come out looking real good in the third quarter but dwindle quickly. In the end, all the Razorback fans that drove to Austin realize that it would have been far-less painful to simply stay at home and beat themselves senseless with a 3-iron… then numb their self-inflicted pain by downing countless handles of Heaven Hill vodka on a mostly-empty stomach while attempting to perform jump rope tricks and feats of strength involving ladders and a stray dog known only as “Barry.” Anyway, Go Hogs!
Texas 38, Arkansas 10
Ted Dancin’ says: Since Dick now has to throw at the feet of every receiver, little Michael Smith is his only option. There’s only so much one guy can do, y’all.
Texas 42, Arkansas 21
Dern L. says: Does anyone else remember a Will Muschamp-led Auburn defense hold the greatest backfield we will likely see at Arkansas to under 70 yards rushing and zero touchdowns last year? I do. This year’s Texas defense is not as good as last year’s Auburn defense, but this is the first road game for a freshman-packed Arkansas team. Expect Texas to run the ball like crazy burnt orange boner eaters. Dick throws three picks by halftime. Petrino gets hungry toward the end of the third quarter.
Texas 52, Arkansas 13
sg says: ear Diary, Today was a good day. I got to drink two Shasta’s at lunch and Rick wasn’t even mean to me. Oh, I have a really cool new wish — I wish Judge Reinhold was my dad or brother. He is so funny in Turner and Hooch.
Texas 36, Arkansas 20
the Steve says: Well crap.
Texas 56, Arkansas 3
Farrah says: Dick throws 2 interceptions and 1 ring to rule them all. GO HOGS!
Texas 38, Arkansas 10
Discussion
The Fayetteville Flyer doesn't necessarily condone the comments here, nor does it review every post. Read our full policy.
By Squidge on September 25th, 2008
I cover my eyes the whole time because I’m frightened to watch.
Texas 56 Arkansas 7
By Lankford on September 25th, 2008
Petrino is shown on camera shaking his head in disapproval 3 times.
Texas 45, Arkansas 24
By Total Bastard on September 25th, 2008
Our defense is horrendous - 17
BOOM M*THER F*CKER! - 56
By Sardon on September 25th, 2008
Don’t watch this game with the naked eye, and keep away from spoons or you’ll be tempted to spoon out your eyeballs.
I’m thinking 77 to 7. Tejas needs to punish us for past indignities, like beating them in Austin and Dallas the last two times we played them in the Republic. Saban did us a mercy rule favor by not running up the score any more than he had to. It was a fourth string RB who broke that 62 yarder. He just couldn’t help himself. I’d do the same. I’d have to keep running to the goal line if all the Hogs refused to tackle me.
Mack Brown will show no mercy. We used to be a minor annoyance to the Horns, but now they owe us a spanking. It’s going to hurt.
By George on September 25th, 2008
Not so fast my friend….You are all forgetting that it’s also ACL weekend in Austin. Since this was going to be an open date, the entire Texas team bought tickets. Here’s the way it will go down:
13 players have their minds fucking blown by Gogol Bordello’s live show. They immediately quit the team and move to the Ukraine to find out what spawned such awesomeness
11 players overdose on weed (yes, it can happen) at the Slightly Stoopid show
10 players are convinced by Manu Chao to drop everything and join the Peace Corp
8 have such a blast at the festival Friday night, they say “Fuck it. We’re not missing Fleet Foxes, CSS, and MGMT for some fucking football game.”
7 players trip balls at the Mars Volta show and are last seen running naked through Zilker Park barking like dogs
6 players are still waiting outside the park for cabs when the game starts (anyone who’s tried this knows it’s a real possibility)
4 players are simply still drunk
The Hogs squeak out a victory over the makeshift Texas squad of 3rd and 4th teamers.
Arkansas - 24
Texas - 23
By Hankalicious on September 26th, 2008
Good god, George! I thought I was the only one who had dilusions of grandeur about the hogs this year. You watched last week’s game (and that hot blond waitress’ possibly fake boobs). You do realize that Dick threw more touchdown passes to Alabama than to Arkansas, right? Unless there’s a mandatory 10 shots of absinthe laced with opium for every Texas player before game time we’re losing this one big time. As a Hog fan I’ll be hoping that they’re chasing the dragon, but realistically I think we’ll be chasing our curly little piggy tails all day as they run past our defense. To misquote Hemingway; “The absinthe is always sweeter after victory.” The only thing we will lead the game in will be turnovers, missed tackles and tears. Texas-56 Hogs-7 WE BLOW GOATS!
By Boggy Creek Creature on September 26th, 2008
Holy shit! George, you magnificent bastard!
I don’t care about the football, but a Gogol Bordello reference! Long live Gypsy Punk!
Fleet Foxes! And MGMT!
My god, I’ve never used that many exclamation points in one post before.
p.s.-weeping baby jesus, did you hear the Wilco/Fleet Foxes cover of “I Shall Be Released”?
By George on September 26th, 2008
Haha. Thanks BCC. Can you tell I’m more than a little pissed that I can’t go this year? Just watched the Wilco/FF version of “I Shall Be Released”. That is mother f’ing awesome! I think I cried a little…in a manly way.
Hank - You’re becoming a real pessimist bastard. First of all, did you see Oregon St beat USC last night? Anything can happen. You gotta believe. Second, who gives a shit if her boobs were fake. They were glorious and you know it!!! Who knew your little Jewish retirement community of Del Boca Vista, AR actually has some smoking hot chicks?
Trackbacks