Getting down to the wire
It’s getting down to it, y’all. Only two days left to buy those last minute Christmas gifts. To be honest, you should probably be out shopping right now. Every second you delay increases your last minute Christmas shopping stress by a factor of 3.
Don’t worry, though, there’s still plenty of time to wait in traffic, spend 20 minutes looking for a parking spot, fight the crowds, pray that somehow, by the grace of God, there is still a Wii left, realize there isn’t a Wii left, quickly scan the aisles for something else that will suffice, pick something out that you’re not happy with and will most likely be returned, fight your way back to the checkout line, wait in line for an eternity while you get behind the one person that ends up needing a price check, checkout, almost get run over while walking back to your car, throw the gift in the back, hop in the car, cuss very loudly to yourself, begin wondering why you didn’t take care of all this shopping earlier on, pull out, head to the next store, repeat.
Last minute Christmas shopping sucks. To all of you out there who still haven’t finished shopping. I’m sorry. You’re in for a world of hurt when you get out there.
Luckily, I’ve got some suggestions on where to shop and what to buy in order to avoid the big crowds and long lines.
Meats & Cheeses – For the meat lover in your life, why not go to Richards and buy thick steak and some delicious cheese? Turkey and ham are great for Christmas, but they still pale in comparison to a delicious steak… especially from Richards. Just make sure that you don’t simply wrap it and put it under the tree. That would make for a smelly and unedible Christmas steak. No one likes a nasty Christmas steak.
Books/Gift Card – Believe it or not, most Americans can read above a sixth-grade level. I have no proof of this, but I’m 40%-65% sure I’m right. Anyway, why not skip the big brand book stores and head down to Nightbird or the Dickson Street Bookstore and pick up a book or nine? Don’t know which books to buy? Then get a gift card or purchase some store credit. If the person you’re buying for can’t read, then buy a picture book. Plus you can feel good about supporting local businesses.
Beer – Yup. Beer. If you’ve got a beer lover in your life and you still haven’t picked up a gift for them yet, why not head down to your favorite liquor store and pick up a bunch of brews? Maybe piece together a couple six-packs with the individual beers for sale. If you don’t know what to get, just ask the clerk. If they can’t help you out, you’re at the wrong liquor store.
Used DVD’s and/or Video Games – Has your husband worn out that VHS tape of Coach he recorded off TV 15 years ago? Head down to Hastings, Gamexchange or Gamestop and see if you can find it used on DVD. Used DVD’s are just as good as new ones(as long as they’ve been resurfaced) and if you’re planning on spending X amount of money on gifts, it will allow you to buy more of them. The more Coach DVD’s, the better. Same goes for video games.
Restaurant Gift Card – We all love not cooking, right? So why not give the gift of not having to cook and pick up a gift card at their favorite eating establishment? If that place is McDonald’s, then you don’t even have to get out of the car… and you can get a Quarter Pounder while you’re at it. Win-win.
Massage – No, I’m not saying that you should give the massage yourself… though, that would be a good way to give a cheap gift. But only if you’re good and it. Everyone likes massages. Even the dudes that pretend that massages are for girls and are worried about what will happen if another dude is their masseuse, if you catch my drift. Either way, it’s a great last minute gift.
Beer – I already said that? Well, let this serve as a reminder that beer makes a great gift… A delicious, delicious, holiday de-sensitizing gift.
If you’re not done shopping, I hope that my little list here will be of some benefit in your quest to find the perfect last minute Christmas gift. When you’re out shopping, just make sure to watch yourself and be careful. There’s a bunch of other crazed, panicked last minute shoppers out there on the roads and a fender bender will, in all likelyhood, push you over the edge. God speed.
Do you guys have any other last minute X-Mas shopping ideas?
One last thing. When you’re out there in the middle of the Christmas chaos, make sure to treat the employees at the stores with a little bit of respect. It’s not their fault the store sold out of the particular item you should have bought weeks, if not months, ago. So don’t scream at or take your frustration out on them because of it. It won’t get you anywhere. A little bit of kindness goes a long way to those who work retail. They deal with enough jerks on a day-to-day basis. It’s Christmas, y’all! Try and spread a little bit of holiday cheer instead of holiday hate. Please? Santa’s watching.
Comments
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By jones on December 23rd, 2008
Speaking from experience, the beer idea is a great one. For my birthday last year, I received a ton of beers from the “build your own” six-pack section of Liqour Mart. It was cool because it gave me the chance to try a bunch of beers I’d never had before.