Hogs Guy Predicts: LSU vs. Arkansas

The final score was Arkansas 31, LSU 23. Congrats to inlaw josie wales who guessed Arkansas 31, LSU 24.

This college football sports article is for all of the Thanksgivers and or Thankstakers out there. It is one thing to be both of them and another thing to not be any of them. Just try to understand all of the football facts that I will tell you below. If it would help you, try getting a facts machine. But here is a good luck mention and a warning – I have never been able to get one question answered with the ones I have purchased for my house. All it does is sit there and look like a phone and sound very crazy. I recommend you practice intelligence and smarts. Try now.

Fact 1: I L-O-V-E the Arkansas Razorbacks football team. I’ll prove it with more facts! Fact 2: They are good for all to watch them play football. Fact 3: Ryan Mallett. Fact 4: He is their starter quarterbacks player. Fact 5: He is a great good player. Varying facts: We also have a good wide receivers and a few of them. And then Knife Knile Davis too who does many football runnings plays. There are several men who do defenses for us and they’re good. More facts, Bobby Petrino is the big coach for all other coaches to listen to and take advice from.

On Saturday (of last week) the Arkansas Razorback football squad played a football game against the entire state of Mississippi. And then guess what happened? The Razorbacks were better and won the game by scoring 38 points (for us) and only allowing Miss State to scoring 31 (points). The crazy thing was that the game had “overtime.” Overtime is when both teams decide as friends to keep playing the football games because they are having so fun and want to score more points to decide who will be the winner of the game and get an extra win on their winner slash loser record.

Hogs Guy shows off his Arkansas Razorbacks belt buckle.

Lucky for us, we got to win it all! We won because of Ryan Mallett and his several football throwings for several 6 point touchdowns. And because Knife Davis and his football runnings for several 6 point touchdowns. And because the defenders did good tackles and fumble plays. Bad times were when Malletts did an intercept pass play, Knife did two fumble plays, rookie football kicker Zach Hockey Hocker did a football kick miss kick play and all Miss State scorings.

Bad news doesn’t matter! Think back to what I told you early. We won it all! And now we have won a lot and 9 of all our games this year! And now we are the #12 of #1 teams out there and have a luck shot at playing in a good footbowl game for sugar! 

Imagine a road for cars. Imagine the Arkansas Razorbacks are in a big ole van driving down the road you imagined a second ago. Imagine that they are blocked from driving to a cool place like a mall. Guess who they are blocked by. Wrong. Give up? Try again. Dumb guess. Hint. Nope. It is the whole entire state of Louisiana! And tigers!

If that imagination sequence you had were real, then that is what the LSUs Tigers are trying to do to us. And it is dumb or mean. Or stupid to think they can do it. Even if they are the #5 of #1 teams out there, they really can’t do it. Can they?

No.

If you haven’t figured it out yet, the Razorbacks only have one basic football season game left and it is going to be played against the LSUs. Also the game will be conducted in Little Rock (in Arkansas). And it is at the War Memorial football field stadium. Also everyone will be wearing gold boots or something with trophies on them. All important details for considering who will win.

More details. LSUs has a decent offensive play plan and they have a man who can throw footballs AND run with footballs – the Razorbacks don’t like men like that because they have a hard time guessing which way they go or throw. LSUs also has a good defense too. And the big coach for them is a man who plays tricks on people. The contest will be solid and tough. Don’t get tricked. Keep cheering and guessing. Do yells and cheers.

We don’t like tricks or marbles lined up. We like winnings of games and whatever stories go along with them. We like to win it all! And have it all! So they will do it all!

And if you’re wanting to take me on in a bet, you can. I think this is how the game will turn out – Arkansas Razorbacks 28, LSU 27. If you think you can beat me, first off, you can’t. Get a life. Second off, tell me YOUR score guess below. I’d say good luck, but you’ve already lost. And don’t even think about guessing AGAINST the Hogs. If you do, the turkey food on your plate will do magic and come back to life and run away. You would be hungry, but not really because I will put spikey rocks and twigs on a spoon and make you eat it for lunch and dinner. No sauces or salads. Or chewing. You can have oatmeal for breakfast.

I’m Hogs Guy. Bye.

How to enter

Leave a comment with your game prediction. If you want to add anything else, feel free.

What you’ll win

One t-shirt of your choice (size, color, style) from the Flyer Shop.

The rules

• You only may enter this specific contest once.
• Contests are open to anyone anywhere except staff of Fayetteville Flyer and their immediate family members.
• The winning entry must pick the winning team and have the smallest combined difference from each team’s final score. Example: If the Razorbacks win by a score of 21-7, and your prediction was Razorbacks 20-10, your difference would be 1 + 3 = 4. In the event of a tie, a winner will be selected by a random drawing.
• You must pick the score by 15 minutes before kickoff for each game.

Good luck!